If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?	If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that one out of five enjoys it?
Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive?	What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice: When you put the two words 'The' and 'IRS' together, it spells 'THEIRS'?	Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?	Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?
Do Lipton Tea employees take 'coffee breaks?	If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?	If a cow laughed, would milk come out of her nose?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?	I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use, Toothpicks?